I really try my best to manage my life and that of the kids as best as I can, but today.......well, let's just say today I failed on all fronts. No matter how you put it, or what excuse you come up with, I failed my son miserably.
I was so excited this morning, and a bit anxious, knowing that I only had three more days to finish up everything before the kids were home for Xmas break. Everyday this week was taken by some kind of event - Christmas party, babysitting, hair salon - and I only had Friday left for shopping. To be exact, only two hours for shopping, since our schools are getting out early on Friday. So I sent Nicolas on his way to his field trip this morning completely dressed up in his pajamas. He really did not want to get on the bus, but by the time I talked to him, not only was he wearing his pajama but a Santa hat to match. I was so proud of him, as I waved goodbye to that little body peering out of that big bus.
I rushed to get Olivia off to daycare, so I could try and tackle all the stores in less then two hours. It was pouring rain outside, but I managed to hit Walmart, Target, Toys R Us, and Sam's in two hours, and still unload groceries, hide the toys, and get back to Elementary School in time for the Xmas party. I was beyond estatic. Overjoyed that I managed to find everything I wanted and then some. I ran into the classroom completely out of breath only to find an empty room. The teacher stuck her head around her computer, and said Hi. My first question was whether I missed the party. "No", she said very quietly. "I was just going to send you an email, because the party is tomorrow, as is the field trip." My jaw just dropped. How could I have gotten those dates confused. I write everything down on three calendars, and each calendar said the same thing. Tuesday. Oh no, Nicolas. Oh no. His teacher realized what I was thinking and said "I tried not to say anything to him all day, in the hopes he would not even notice. He does not seem upset. " Oh no. My poor little shy one, dressed up in his pajamas all by himself. What did I do? So I talked to him, and he immediately started crying. He said everyone made fun of him on the bus. My heart had just been broken into a million pieces. Why did this happen? What did I do? He asked that I take him home. I signed him out of school and talked to him during the entire ride.
I don't think the kids were laughing at him, but laughing with him. Telling him he looked like Santa. He is very sensitive, and as his mom I was trying to find some way to appease him. Once we got home, I hugged him again, and apologized for getting the dates confused. His reply "It's ok mom, I can't wait for tomorrow!"
Two hours later, I am still mad at myself, but I feel better that he has obviously forgotten all about his morning at school. Kids have a miraculous way of just throwing time and all the horrible events out of the window and leaving them there forever. As an adult, I learned a lesson today, and that is to just forget about it too, and remember how great I felt this morning as I waved goodbye to my cute little Elf.
Christmas is about good things....the kind gentleman who helped me load my groceries into the car, the cashier that wished me a Merry Christmas, and the maillady who delivers a heavy package to my door everyday.
