All morning long, I wasted my time looking for a church or daycare that could offer me some kind of assistance with Olivia. I don't want to put her in daycare five days a week, nor do I want to pay them for not having to take care of my child. I would like to find a program that offers me assistance two days a week for three or four hours. Nothing to be found. At least not where I live. Tired and upset, I went grocery shopping, and the two of us stayed entertained for awhile. On the way home, she fell asleep in the car, and took a nice long 3 hour nap. Perfect.I realized then that it was not so bad to have her with me. As long as I could keep her entertained for about two hours during the morning hours, the other hour she spent watching Barney, then I actually was quite happy with what I could accomplish. I met Nicolas at the bus stop, and together we spent about 30 minutes discussing his day. Very nice, and very calm. Just the way I like it.
However, I realized that there were times, when I needed to go to the hairdresser, or doctor, and although my friends have always been willing to step in for me, I hate to inconvenience anyone. I also realized that taking a break from the kids is healthy and necessary. To breathe a sigh of relief when you can clean the house, read a book, or sew. It really is good to have a break every once and awhile, and I know I need one.
Things are going to get alot tougher once Nicolas starts playing soccer two nights a week, and the holidays approach. I need to keep my sanity....if not for the kids sake......then for mine.
